Ham and Eggs Among Other Things

I have proven, in times gone by, that if I eat a big breakfast of ham and eggs, I will automatically eat less through the rest of the day and will, eventually, lose some weight. It works for me but I don’t know if it will work for other people or not. I am not like everybody else. I am a special case. My metabolism has been screwed over by years of dieting and weight lifting and body building …walking …running … wrestling …doing all the other boring shit that body builders do. My reward for all this is a big, muscular body that the doctors call “Obese.” But they are trying to cram me into a mold designed to fit the average human being and I am not an average human being so their shit charts don’t work for me or on me.

After the ham and eggs breakfast, I dragged my 84-year-old body out the front door of my home and went on a two-mile power walk. What is a power walk? A power walk is where you walk for a few minutes and then jog for a few minutes and then walk some more. You repeat that sequence throughout the entire time of the walk.

after the power walk, I walked some more to the local Kroger store where I purchased a couple of scratch off lottery tickets and won a Hundred dollars. ($80 profit on that trip.) The other night, I got three hits on a ticket that required 6 hits in order to win a jackpot of Twenty Million dollars. But the payout on the three hits was so small I am embarrassed to admit what it was. I don’t know why I even play the damned lottery games because I am flush to begin with. Just bored, I guess.

I found some “Simple Soap” on Amazon so I am going to order it and try it out. It was recommended to me by a fellow blogger. I am always trying new soaps and colognes and razor blades out to see if I can find the perfect one for me. It has been years since I started this fetish now and I am still at it so maybe I can never be satisfied with anything. This brings to my mind something that happened to me lots of years ago now.

It was in the late 1950s and I was young and dumb and full of cum … as the saying used to go … and I was in Cincinnati, Ohio on the observation deck of the tallest building in the city at the time, The Carew Tower.” I went to Cincinnati at lot in those days just to run around and sow some wild oats.

Earlier in the day I had visited a drug store there and purchased a package of latex prophylactics … I had a lot of machismo back in those days … and it came to my mind that I should take one of the rubbery things out of the package and blow it up into an enormous balloon and tie it so that the air could not escape easily.

After having accomplished that little technicality, I took the balloon to the edge of the observatory and threw it over the edge to watch it float. I was 48 stories up in the air at that time.


In a few minutes, the balloon had floated far enough away that I decided to use one of the high-powered coin-operated telescopes on the observation deck to keep track of the balloon on its travels.

The balloon floated to a distance of about a mile and a half away and when it was above the center of the Ohio River, it suddenly deflated and fell into the water. I imagine someone must have taken a shot at it.

Regardless of what happened to the balloon, I felt a sense of satisfaction from having inflated it and released it and watched it on its journey.

I had to admit that blowing that damned thing up made me a little dizzy — even at that young age.

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