Untitled – 3/17/2023

Is there any reason to think that something written in a personal blog by a person who is more or less a nobody as far as the rest of society is concerned will have any impact or be of use to anyone else? Isn’t the very thought the height of vanity?

Yet here we are, writing our asses off every day in the hopes that something we cast into the water will return something to us … even though we really don’t have any idea of what will return — and chances are, more often than not, nothing will return. Even so, that which is written is never lost but is drifting around somewhere in the great Interstellar regions waiting to be received somewhere by someone.

I have been fascinated by artificial intelligence for a few days now. It is something brand new and one of these days, it might have a great deal of control over how we all spend our days. I think it will come to affect everything from our daily habits and routines to the very things that are available to us at all kinds of levels — and the prospect is both exciting and frightening at the same time. How much control can the machines be given before they develop the ability to reason and then work their way into control of everyone and everything?

When I started writing blogs back in the year 2010, I wanted to connect with other people who were like-minded to my vision about things, and in all that time I have found only 5 wonderfully patient souls who are willing to put up with my mundanity and while that fact is a blessing beyond price, it is indicative of the fact that most of what we have to say is of little or no interest to anyone at all … so sooner or later the question arises, “Why do we do it?”

Well, I will tell you that I do it for a couple of reasons — I do it because it relaxes me and because there is always the hope that someone who shares my views about things might make contact with me and I can make more new friends. Another reason I blog is that I am vain as hell and I need ego gratification like addicts need drugs. Another reason is that I have feelings of insufficiency and a fear of being isolated, and abandoned, — even though being isolated is actually the most comfortable condition for me. I am something of an eccentric hermit. I do sequester at home more than I seek social interactions. Maybe I am just a terribly insecure person … I do not really know what it is with me… but I am driven to write and so write I do… no matter how blase and dull it might be …. I have always said, “If you write it, somebody, somewhere will, sooner or later, find what you have written and will, at least, give it a cursory glance.

This has been a trying week for me. I have had eye surgery that came out well even though I worried about it. I am such a pussy sometimes. I like to appear as this big, bad, machismo man but inside, I am still a whimpering child when things threaten me. You have my permission to consider what I just said as a blatant overshare … which, of course, is part of the purpose behind this blog.

Along with the eye surgery, this has been another week when several friends have died. My tribe has decreased rather significantly this year — Two cousins went to their reward this very week and another is on her deathbed even as I write. It sucks and it is shit but it is life and I have to cope with it.

Lately, I have been fascinated by Cajun food… don’t ask me why … I am a very fad-driven individual and I like to try all kinds of new things … and Cajun food has been appealing to me lately. I like Jambalaya a lot and Gumbo …. I never ate shrimp very much in my entire life but lately, I have had an appetite for it …but it is alright to put chicken, sausage, pork and beef into the Cajun dishes too and I love all of those. I even bought some Old Bay seasoning to make my food spicier. I like food with a kick. I also like food that is flavorful. That is my “Kick” this week … Cajun dishes. Good to make a change from the biscuits and sausage biscuit routine from time to time.

Damn, I am getting chatty here. I am sure that nobody will read this whole damned thing but I am on a roll and cannot seem to contain myself at this minute.

Alright friends and neighbors, mommies and daddies and little kiddies everywhere, I will sign off for now and will see you again soon if the Lord is willing and the creek don’t rise.

The writing prompt for today is, “What activities do you immerse yourself in?” The answer is that I do not immerse myself in anything except counting my money and I don’t even have to do that because there is this really nice young broker that works for a large insurance company and he is a financial adviser and he takes care of all the details for me — and all I have to ever do is to lay around and do anything I want to do or to do nothing at all if that is what pleases me. I do take a lot of naps. I love to lay in that huge bed of mine … I even have to use a step stool to get into it. But I have always had a hunger for things that are bigger than life and flashy — I do have a superego for sure.

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